70 hours, 90 hours, 100 hours a week, goes the saying by Mahagyaanis of the corporate world, thriving on the Master-Slave relationship (can’t be employer-employee for sure). It’s going only worse with expected weekly workhours increasing every new sermon.
In the high-stakes world of corporate leadership, there’s an unwritten rule that if your employees aren’t logging at least 70 hours a week, you must be doing something wrong. Enter the corporate honcho, armed with PowerPoints filled with buzzwords like “synergy,” “next-level productivity,” and, of course, “if you’re not working 100 hours a week, are you even trying?”
Here’s my take on this phenomenon:
The Clockwork Hornets
Imagine a room full of over-caffeinated CEOs buzzing around like clockwork hornets, proudly boasting about their 100-hour workweeks. “I sleep five hours a night, and that’s just because I want to feel human!” they exclaim.
Meanwhile, their employees are wondering if they should start a GoFundMe for a nap room.
The real benefit? Honchos get to parade around like they’re the Spartans of the corporate world, while their teams are left with Starbucks and daydreams of vacation.
The Domino Effect
It all starts with one bold leader declaring, “I’m working 80 hours a week!” before encouraging everyone else to follow suit. Soon, the employees are trapped in a game of corporate chicken, where each one is trying to outdo the other in hours worked.
“I pulled an all-nighter,” one says, while the other counters, “Oh yeah? I worked through Thanksgiving/Diwali/Christmas!”
This creates a glorious race to the bottom, where the winners get exhaustion and the losers… well, they’re still trying to catch up on sleep.
The Profitability Paradox
“What’s the key to profitability?” the honchos rally. “More hours!” It’s a masterstroke of logic: If you exhaust your employees to the brink of collapse, they’ll be so desperate for a paycheck that they’ll complete every project with a heart rate resembling a caffeinated rabbit.
Meanwhile, the honchos sit back and revel in their bonuses (mostly in millions), convinced their demanding schedules are driving the company to new heights. After all, who needs happy workers when you’ve got spreadsheets?
The Management Work-Life Balance Dictionary
Let’s not forget the Corporate Dictionary, where “work-life balance” is defined as “working until your life stops mattering.” Here’s how it translates in the boardroom: “If you push our team to work excessive hours, they’ll eventually become superhuman!”
Little do they realise that the only superpower employees develop is the ability to survive on three hours of sleep and a constant supply of energy drinks.
The Inspirational Chats
One of the best tools in the honcho’s arsenal is the nightly motivational Zoom call. Besides questioning your mother’s character (remember the Ed-tech founder?), it could also include:
“Listen up, team! I believe in you! If I can handle 18-hour days while buying a yacht and living out my dreams, you can handle these spreadsheets!”
The employees nod half-heartedly, dreaming of a world where their only responsibility is pressing the snooze button. But the honcho walks away, convinced they’ve just sparked the next great corporate renaissance.
The Ultimate Exit Strategy
As every great entrepreneur knows, a successful exit strategy is key. Corporate honchos know that the more overtime they push, the quicker employees will burn out and leave. Voila! Problem solved! Less workforce means more productivity for the few who remain—and more chances for the honchos to stroll far ahead of the pack, flaunting their “grit” while writing trend pieces on why employees just can’t keep up.
All in all, the zealous push for unrelenting work hours benefits corporate leaders more than anyone else. It fuels their mythos as tireless warriors in the corporate battlefield while the rest are left to pick up the pieces of their work-life balance (or more aptly, their work-life tumble). So next time a honcho praises the virtues of the 100-hour week, just remember: it’s not a call to arms; it’s a call to the exit door… and it leads right to their yacht.
It’s not nation building, it’s their superyatch building, their millions dollar apartment building, billion dollar wedding building, million dollar gifts to new-borns in family building!
As someone commented on my post of yesterday, it’s not nation building, it’s notion building.
You decide as to what’s a better mix for you – comprising of family, health, life, hobby, work and so on. Whether you want to die surrounded by family members or office colleagues (they may not notice you’re dead on your desk or may not have the time even to attend your funeral, by the way) is your choice.
The only people missing you after you die will be your family members. You can replace a toxic job, but not your family. An office will abandon or replace you if they find you expensive or not fit for a job any more, your family most likely will not.
Be yourself, do what you like. Your life, your choices.
Best of luck.
